Poems from a Tragic Comic Book Cover (2006)

Five years ago I published my first book of poetry, Poems from a Tragic Comic: Surviving cancer, drinking, and women.

My idea for the cover was almost a precursor to this blog, and my sister Carolyn made the idea a reality.

I wanted the cover to be a smorgasbord of events and emotions that captured the kinds of feelings contained in my poems. There are medical things, drinking things, dating things, and sports things.

The BC hockey pieces demonstrate this wide range of emotions in particular. I wanted to include a BC-BU ticket because that rivalry is near and dear to my heart. The BC hockey pictures define the Wide World of Sports tagline “The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat” – they are the sign on the Mass Pike after BC won the championship in 2001, and a picture of the players after they lost the championship game in OT in 1998.

Most of the other items I’ve blogged about already:

1. My Friends in Blue
2. Court Summons from a Best Friend
3. Hospital Bracelets – Cancer and Kidney Stone
4. Note from Suzie
5. Rejection Letter from BC Stylus (which is also included in this book – a promise I made myself when they rejected me)
6. Tragic Comic Note
7. Focusin
8. Note from a Friend
9. Westboro House of Pizza Menu

Eventually, I’ll have to make one huge collage of everything I scan.

More on BC hockey tomorrow…

Bag from Childhood

I’m not sure when exactly I had this bag, but I’m guessing it was from preschool. I like the fact that you can tell I wanted to write my own initials next to the felt ones. Also, not sure why there is a strawberry on it – never been much of a fan. Anyway, I thought I’d share a few of my favorite stories from that time…

My nephews’ favorite story is the one that involved my first encounter with a man in blue. I had just learned how to ride a bike, and was proudly circling and swerving all over Bowman Street. I was so happy, I wasn’t even paying attention to see if there were any cars coming my way. Then, a police officer driving by noticed my disregard for potential traffic and gave me a stern talking to. I was so upset, that I went inside crying. My wonderful mom was there to comfort me, and she asked me what was wrong. Not wanting to tell her that I had upset a cop, I quickly came up with a fake bee sting story. But as she looked me over for where I was stung, the man in blue appeared at our kitchen door. He apologized and said he didn’t mean to scare me, but just wanted to make sure I was being safe. And I was caught in my lie. Luckily my mom wasn’t too upset about the lie and was just glad I was okay.

Another time my mother was getting ready to take my older sister to school. It was her birthday, and she had made cupcakes for Carolyn and all of her classmates. We were only minutes from leaving, but I decided to personally sample each cupcake by taking frosting off of each one with my finger (I guess that was better than just downing a whole one? Maybe I figured there wouldn’t be enough that way?). My mom came in to catch me in the act and my only response was, “Good cake, Mom!”

Then, of course, there was the time I dared my younger brother to pee on me. My plan was simple: I’d ask him and right when he was about to do it, I’d jump out of the way. It was a huge setup to get him in trouble (for no reason other than my amusement, I think). Amazingly, it went just as I planned. I dared him, he aimed, and I moved. A nanosecond after his stream hit the bureau, I was yelling “Daddy, Tommy peed on his bureau!” I was amused, but our dad was not.

The Social Network from Netflix (What would my status updates have been when I was a freshman?)

Facebook didn’t exist when I was in college. A few people I knew had email, and I remember my junior year being part of my first instant messaging experience. I made it through four years undergrad at Boston College and two years getting my Master’s at Wheelock College without even owning a computer. I know I am dating myself, but these are the facts. After recently watching The Social Network, I thought it might be amusing to see what would have been some of my status updates in my four years at Boston College…

Here are some that would have been entered for my first year followed by more thoughts about the movie – I tried as much as possible to use the correct dates for when everything actually happened using my medical records and internet searches…

August 31, 1992 2:07 PM – Just arrived at Gonzaga with my fam, it’s wicked hot out and I’m the only one in my room. I’m betting I’m the only one in my dorm who went through chemotherapy for a brain tumor this summer…

Dave McGrath is now friends with Patrick Salmon

September 2, 1992 7:34 PM – Met the new roommates and told one of them about my cancer. That was a lot harder than I thought it was gonna be…

September 4, 1992 11:32 AM – Off to UMass in “Woostah” for my sixth round of chemo, hope all the hot nurses are workin’ this weekend!

September 5, 1992 12:00 PM – May be in the hospital, but still watching the first BC Football game…GO EAGLES!!!

September 5, 1992 1:36 PM – Halftime of BC-“Rutgahs” and I’m being interviewed for the Worcester Telegram! (35 people like this)

September 6, 1992 8:04 PM – First day of school tomorrow…

September 8, 1992 1:15 PM – Some dude in my dorm didn’t believe me when I told him my pre-chemo senior prom picture was me. Ouch. Told him about the big “C” too…

September 8, 1992 3:16 PM Just saw the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen in one of my psych classes…

September 10, 1992 1:55 PM – Just puked at The Rat into the garbage in front of everyone, that was fun…thanks for the help, Chris!

Dave McGrath is now friends with Tim St. Louis

September 14 2:07 PM – Thought about preaching to a few cigarette smokers on campus, but kept my mouth shut…

September 16, 1992 10:11 AM – Happy Birthday, Ca!

September 16, 1992 12:17 PM Going back to UMass today, damn low counts and fever…

September 18, 1992 2:32 PM – at least Benadryl in the IV is nice…

September 21, 1992 4:05 PM – Still in the hospital, but a guy from my dorm lent me NHL Hockey ’93 for my Sega…off to play

September 22, 1992 11:30 AM – is listening to new Extreme album his brother Jon brought him on the Discman he lent him…thanks, Jon!

September 23, 1992 10:02 AM – Been at the hospital for a week now…Happy Birthday, Dad!

September 26, 1992 8:03 PM – thinks Tragic Comic is one of the best songs ever written…

September 27, 1992 2:30 PM – Being discharged today! Also, met with radiologist and he said I won’t be needing radiation…Great news, but doesn’t surprise me! (102 people like this)

September 28, 1993 5:00 PM – my RA left me a bunch of angry notes asking why I wasn’t attending any hall meetings. Sorry dude, I was in the hospital because of cancer…

September 28, 1993 5:05 PM – just made my RA feel like crap and he apologized for not knowing what was going on...

October 5, 1992 10:10 AM - Happy Birthday, Mom!

October 8, 1992 5:33 PM – Off to the “Gahden” for Bruins home opener…go B’s!

October 8, 1992 10:43 PM – Back from game, B’s win in OT!!!!

Dave McGrath is no longer listed as "In a relationship"

October 18, 1992 11:38 AM - Happy Birthday, Tom!

October 31, 1992 10:32 PM – Back from Bruins game with my dad…B’s lose 3-2, but some dude dressed as Pope was ripping up pictures of Sinead O’Connor

November 7, 1992 8:25 PM – tough loss for the Eagles against ND…ouch.

November 24, 1992 11:30 AM – Back home for Turkey Day!

November 26, 1992 12:00 PM – Happy Thanksgiving!

November 26, 1992 3:00 PM – Just took a picture of my father clearing a dish…first time for everything!

November 27, 1992 12:47 PM – Getting ready for some post-Turkey Day street hockey at Fales…all are welcome to join!

November 28, 1992 8:04 PM – Have you ever been to Mass and the sermon was about you?

Dave is now friends with Wendy Douglas

December 11, 1992 11:43 AM – Happy Birthday, Meg…welcome to your teens!!

December 14, 1992 – “FUCK FINAL!” – Written on a stall in Gonzaga Hall Men’s Room

December 18, 1992 2:46 PM – Off to the ‘Boro for XMAS…see ya later, BC!

January 19, 1993 3:33 PM – Back on The Heights, B’s just tied the Isle…dammit

January 22, 1993 6:48 PM – off to Godzilla Burger with the guys from the dorm and after that: party on Comm Ave!

January 22, 1993 8:22 PM – Where have you been all my life?

January 23, 1993 12:05 AM – Puked all over myself at party, thank you to Patrick and Chris for carrying me home…music before sleep, I’m thinkin’ Commitments…

January 23, 1993 10:32 AM – Back from brunch at McElroy, just found out hot girl from psych class saw me being carried home last night…D’oh!

January 23, 1993 1:45 PM – Best line from last night. My friend Mike’s friend: I think your friend spilled his beer. Tim: I think he spilled his lunch!

January 25, 1993 6:03 PM – Off to Orpheum with Tom, Patrick, and Tony to see Extreme!!!

February 5, 1993 9:04 PM – Back from skating at Conte with Patrick…ran into Wendy there

February 14, 1993 1:12 PM – just posted entire lyrics to “Cupid’s Dead” on my door

February 20, 1993 12:34 PM – thinks he may have talked to his cousin Katie on the phone last night…will have to check with Patrick

March 5, 1993 3:33 PM – Time for Spring Break! Got a great package that included free transportation, room, and food…going home.

March 17, 1993 3:05 PM – 22???????????????? (My housing lottery number out of 2000something) – only 21 students with worse numbers than me.

March 17, 1993 7:07 PM – Back from Chansky’s with Chris, gonna attempt to forget lottery number…

March 31, 1993 2:15 PM – just wrote poem titled “Sad Deathnight!”

March 31, 1993 7:49 PM – Surprise bday visit from the parents…thanks, Mom and Dad!

April 10, 1993 5:03 PM – Everyone come over to Bowman Street for B’s-Habs game!!!

April 18, 1993 6:45 – off to Walsh Hall to watch B’s playoff game against Sabres…go B’s!

April 18, 1993 10:40 PM – Ouch. Damn you, Sabres.

April 24, 1993 7:30 PM – B’s may get swept tonight, but I’m going to see My Mother’s Fleabag!

April 24, 1993 10:14 PM – B’s swept, but Fleabag was great and Amy Poehler stole the show!

April 25, 1993 4:12 PM – Just won a lip-synch contest with Tim St. Louis performing Denis Leary’s Asshole! Off to be Patrick’s confirmation sponsor…

April 30, 1993 8:43 PM – heading out to off campus “shin dig” with the buds…

May 1, 1993 2:15 PM – last night included: running away from my friends at the party, being picked up and handcuffed by BC cops, and taken to BC infirmary by BCPD…ugh

May 13, 1993 3:00 PM – Survived my first year at BC!!!

May 20, 1993 4:26 PM – Heading to Bull and Finch to watch last episode of Cheers on a big outdoor screen…psyched, but sad.

So, back to the Social Network/Facebook movie….

It was interesting, but definitely not a best picture. I love movies that are true stories, and was surprised I hadn’t found this Chasing the Frog website before. I always check out the IMDB Goofs after watching movies based on true stories, and this one had a few. But, I dug deeper to see what else I could find online relating to the true story of Facebook. Here are some of the things I found:

Articles from The Crimson about Mark Zuckerberg.

Annotated Guide to Crimson Articles mentioned in the Social Network.

The actual Animal Cruelty Article from The Crimson, that doesn’t mention Facebook co-founder Eduardo Saverin by name.

The Synapse website that was Zuckerberg’s senior year project in high school.

An article by Facebook Co-founder Eduardo Saverin – What I Learned From Watching “The Social Network” (I honestly can’t believe this guy has a Facebook page and wants anything to do with the site. If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll understand…)

So, Mr. Zuckerberg, where does Facebook go from here? I’d like to have 7 billion friends. Can Facebook make everyone on earth friends with each other? If not, what’s the point? And for the Love of God, why can’t you make Facebook have the same music pages that Myspace does?

My Friends in Blue...

It's happened to many of us. You're driving fast, not paying that much attention, or you "forgot" that intersection was NO TURN ON RED. Then, you see those blue lights. You say to yourself, "Oh crap, I hope they're not pulling me over." Most of the time, they aren't pulling you over. But sometimes, yup, it's YOU they want...

When this happens to me, I implement steps my friend Drew told me will help get you out of a ticket:

1. Turn your car off and put the keys on the dashboard

2. Get your license and registration out and ready

3. Keep both hands in plain view

4. Smile as you hand your license and registration to the officer

5. If you know what you did wrong, admit it

Believe me, it works. Below are just two of the warnings I have received over the years, and they aren't the only ones. The first one was just for a broken light, so I had no idea why I was being pulled over. The second was a blatant disregard for a stop sign right in front of a police cruiser at the intersection. I followed the steps, and when he asked me if I saw the stop sign I was honest. I said, "Well, I was looking over at you and wanted to make sure I wasn't speeding so I think I didn't notice it." As you can see, he let me off with a warning.

Another time I was driving in Westboro on Lyman Street. There was a car pulling into Tatnuck Bookseller, and as I pulled around him I also crossed over the double yellow line. Just as I was doing this, I noticed a police car coming the other way on Lyman. Seconds after I took a right turn onto Main Street, I was being pulled over. As I handed the officer my credentials, I smiled and said "Double line violation, right?" He came back to my car after running my info and told me my honesty was refreshing and gave me a warning. A similar thing happened when I lived in Waltham. I was driving back to my apartment from getting paper to print my first draft of the first screenplay I had written. I told the officer I was excited to get home to print it, and he laughed and asked me if there were any police officer parts in the movie (If 6 Boston College Police Officers struggling to get a drunk student onto an ambulance count, then yes there are).

Even though I never received a written ticket or warning of any kind, my favorite "Friends in Blue" story happened during the summer between my freshman and sophomore years in college (this was before Drew had given me his advice). I was driving back from a Red Sox game with my brother Tom and we were on Main Street in Westboro. I saw a police cruiser signaling to turn into the station, and kept driving to take a left onto Ruggles Street. I guess the officer wasn't happy I didn't let him turn, because he made a U-turn and he pulled me over on Ruggles. I could tell right away he was upset. Very sternly and with authority he belted out, "You were going 35 miles per hour in a 30 mile per hour zone, do you know what that means?" I wanted to say "I don't get a ticket?", but I kept my mouth shut. He continued and said " I see this car speeding by my house ALL the time. You have a passenger with no seatbelt on and his feet out the window!"

"I'm sorry" was the only thing I could come up with.

"You shouldn't be apologizing to me!", he said.

So, I did the only thing a 19-year-old wiseass thought was appropriate: I turned to my brother Tom and said, "Sorry."

He didn't give me a ticket or a warning, I think he just wanted to remind me who was in charge.

Even with this story, I must say that most of my run-ins with my friends in blue have been pleasant ones - even when I have been, without a doubt, on the wrong side of the law. I'm sure there are police officers who wanted the job just for the "power trip" aspect of it, but I've been lucky for the most part to have not run into these people. So, thank you to those officers who dealt with me when I drank (never driving!) and let me off with warnings when I wasn't drinking. And thank you to every police officer who potentially puts his or her life on the line every day and night at a very difficult job.

PS - When I Googled "My Friends in Blue" I found this poem and a whole site dedicated to police poems....woah!