UMass Cancer Survivor's Day 1993 (Invite, Program, Worcester Telegram Article)

It was 9 months after my last round of chemotherapy for my cancerous brain tumor, and I had just finished my first year of college. After receiving the invite in the mail, my doctor (Molly Schwenn) invited me to be one of the speakers. She had just been one of my strongest allies in my battle with cancer, so it was easy for me to say yes.

I love the lineup of speakers in the program. MD, MD, MD, Dave, MD. It would have been even better if they just wrote “Dave” instead of David McGrath. I was only 19, but I knew those letters didn’t make them better speakers. I doubted any of them were going to talk about being an 18-year-old with a cancerous brain tumor, and that’s what I did.

Like the article says, I opened with a poem I wrote, What She Is, and then started to talk about my diagnosis and treatment at UMass. I talked about how I was also went o UMass for my Crohn’s Disease, and how confident I felt with their treatment. The doctors and nurses at UMass made me feel at ease, well informed, and as comfortable one can be in a hospital setting.

Even though I realized how important my top-notch UMass treatment was, I went on to share what I thought was the reason my chemotherapy worked. The love and support I received from my family is the reason I was able to beat cancer. They knew I had to do it my way, and they were behind me every step of the way. They could tell I wasn’t afraid, and made sure not to show any of their fear in front of me.

My friends were the same. I then talked about a 10-year-old I had met while in treatment. His name was Justin, and his tumor was on his brain stem. This kid was 8 years younger than me, and had even more courage. He had been in treatment for well over a year, and had a few remissions and relapses. Still, I saw the same attitude with Justin and his family as I did with me and mine.

We had cancer. But, we still laughed. We still watched the Red Sox. We still did things with our family and friends. As much as we could, we didn’t let cancer interrupt our lives. This is the lesson cancer taught me:

If you can’t live life with love and humor, there really is no point. Life is always going to throw you sucky days. Sometimes you get a flat tire or in car accident. Sometimes you throw up a lot from chemotherapy. Sometimes a person at work drives you nuts. Sometimes your team loses the big game. Sometimes your best friend sues you. But, you make it through and go onto the next day. You watch a funny movie or hang out with a friend, and you feel thankful. No matter what kind of day you had, you still live, laugh, and love.

The most important thing in life is the people you have in yours…

Damn, I’m lucky.

Bruins/Sharks Roster, 2/10/09

The Bruins seem to do badly when I blog about them on a game day, so I thought I’d get this one in before Boston-Detroit Part II tomorrow…

Two seasons ago, the B’s and Sharks had the best two records in the NHL. I went to the game with my friend Patrick, who always refers to the Bruins/Sharks games as the “Stanley Cup Preview”. This game came with huge hype, but was a big letdown when the Bruins fell to San Jose 5-2. And, neither team even made it to the Finals that year.

In addition to the anticipation of these NHL Powerhouses meeting, I was also interested in a certain player who had made his way onto the San Jose roster. It was #32, Claude Lemieux:

I was never a big fan of Claude. He used his stick a lot and would back down from fights if someone challenged him. Specifically, he did this to Cam Neely:
He most likely backed down because he knew Cam could do things like this:

So, for just about the entire 10 minutes and 1 second Claude was on the ice for this game, I was yelling at him. I’m not very proud of the things I yelled, but they referred to his age (43), how I thought he wasn’t “very tough”, and that he should give up playing hockey. I don’t know if most of the crowd knew why I was doing it, but I didn’t care. They were things I wanted Claude to hear.

After the game, my friend Patrick and were having dessert with my dad. Patrick (from the San Jose area) was gloating a bit, and my father was complaining about how the Bruins didn’t always play the full 60 minutes. I was in my usual post-Bruins-loss-chocolate-brownie-Sundae stupor, but was still hopeful that the B’s would go far in the playoffs.

My dad, Patrick, and I left Legends and were walking down a hallway to see if we could talk to some of the players. My father turned his head laughing and says, “Hey Dave, it’s your buddy!” To get to the waiting area, I had to say “excuse me” to Claude, the guy I had just yelled at for every second he was playing. My friend Patrick got a huge kick out of it, and joked that I should have asked him if he heard me. I didn’t say a thing, and I’m still not a fan…

Even though the B’s got destroyed last night, I still think this team is going to surprise a lot of people this year. GO B’s!!!

Bruins/Red Wings Tickets (2/11/11)

It’s almost Valentine’s Day and I’m in love…with a hockey team.

Seriously, if you’re in New England, how can you not love this Bruins team?

First of all, Tim Thomas is having an unbelievable year. He is a fun guy to watch play net, and has a smile on his face no matter what the score is. He also was a rookie when he was 30, won the Vezina Trophy 2 years ago (most likely again this year), and played on the US Olympic team last year. Here is the latest in goalie leaders from nhl.com:

Oh yeah, he also go into a (kind of) fight the other night.

Enforcers on the Bruins have always been my favorites over the years. There was Terry O’Reilly, Jay Miller, and Lyndon Byers. Now, the B’s have Adam McQuaid, Shawn Thorton, and Gregory Campbell. But these players aren’t goons. They play tough and fight when they need to. And it works. But they aren’t the only three Bruins who are willing to drop the gloves. 16 Bruins have received fighting penalties this year. They don’t take any crap from any team, and they stick up for one another. This is how hockey should be played.

On the offensive side, Patrice Bergeron has 45 points and is a +22. Oh yeah, he’s only 25! David Krejci seems to be coming around, Lucic is having a career year, and Michael Ryder is finding the back of the net. Mark Recchi is leading both on and off the ice, and even though Nathan Horton had a huge cold streak, I like him at least 35 times more than Wideman. I also really like what I’ve seen from Brad Marchand, who is only 22.

Even though I wasn’t impressed with him his first couple of seasons in Boston, Chara is without a doubt the captain of this team. Tallest player, hardest shot ever, and he doesn’t take crap from anyone. When I saw him after the home opener this season, I told him this was the year. I really hope he believed me (See a letter I wrote to him here).

Yes, there have been crappy things about this season. Losing Savard sucks, but I think this team can rally around that. And say what you want about Ference’s comments to the media about Paille’s hit, the B’s are still the B’s and will look out for each other when it counts.

Really looking forward to this Original Six match-up tonight, even though my Michigan-born girlfriend might confuse people with her Bruins-Wings hybrid t-shirt that I made her:

And you heard it here first: This is The Year of the Bruin!! GO B’S!!!

Movie Tickets (Part 1)

My name is Dave and I love going to the movies.

I will try to give brief summaries/memories of each of these as they come to me…

Episode 3 – Getting this ticket was bittersweet for me. I was psyched to be going to another midnight viewing of what I was betting would be the best of the Star Wars prequel movies (I was right). I also knew it would be the last time I would be going to see a Star Wars movie for the first time. On a funny note, I was on the WBZTV news when Joyce Kulhawik reported outside of the theater. And on a side note, two of my friends started dating after they met using two of the tickets that I bought…they are engaged now.

Star Trek – I am not a Star Trek fan and have only seen a handful of the classic TV episodes. When I was young, I saw the first two Star Trek movies, but never watched any of the Next Generation or newer movies. Still, I really enjoyed this movie. It also marked the beginning of one of my best friends moving back to Westboro…and that made me very happy.

High Fidelity – This is still one of my favorite movies and if you haven’t seen it, you should put it on your Netflix list. It’s based on a book, but like Jim Gaffigan says, “You know what I liked about the movie? NO reading…I was done in two hours.” I think I went to see this one with my sister Megan when I lived in Waltham.

The Simpsons – I went to see this after driving 650+ miles to Prince Edward Island. How could I not see the Simpsons Movie on opening night? A couple I met in line could not believe I had awoken in Massachusetts that morning.

Toy Story 3D – I saw this with my brother and his kids. If you’re having a bad day and/or week, these kids are the perfect cure. There aren’t many things I like more than being asked “Uncle Dave, do you want to go to the movies with us?”

Avatar – I saw this with my awesome friend Glen, and I really enjoyed it. I was bummed after the movie because I knew it was the last time I was hanging with Glen before him and his wife moved across the country. Skype has helped in that respect.

Fever Pitch – Always a fan of movies with local flavor. When people I knew heard they were making a movie about a teacher who was a diehard Sox fan, they all jokingly asked if the filmmakers had my permission.

Tron 3D – I saw this with my great friend Andy while he was back in Massachusetts for the holidays. Not as good as the first Tron, but it was pretty cool. Not too many scenes that made the 3D stand out.

Hamlet 2 – Silly comedy I saw with a friend from the camp I worked at in Maine. It made me laugh, haven’t seen it since.

Miracle – Saw this at a sneak preview with my friend Kristen. It made me cry the first time I saw it, and pretty much every time since. The “Do You Believe In Miracles?” documentary is even better, I think.

Still We Believe – Saw this with Glen after we went to a Sox game. It’s the documentary about the 2003 Red Sox Season. I had to turn my head away for Boone’s homerun, but I thought it was a well done film.

Golden Compass – A fantasy book turned into a movie I went to with my friend Cailin. Pretty good movie, and violent at times.

The Town – Like Fever Pitch, I’m always gonna like the Boston-based movies. The Fenway scene in this one was fantastic.

Grown Ups – I saw this with my Little Brother. He laughed a lot, and I did a few times. Obviously not as good as Sandler’s classics like Happy Gilmore.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Not as good as the original, but I am a big fan of Johnny Depp’s work.

Doubt– This was the yearly Christmas movie I see with my sister Megan (and others, it varies from year to year). Another wonderful job by PSH – Meryl Streep and Amy Adams were awesome, too.

Megamind – another one I saw with my Little Brother. A great kids movie (so yeah, I liked it)

Star Wars – the animated Clone Wars movie, I went to see this with my nephews and niece. My niece fell asleep towards the end…I didn’t blame her.

Amityville Horror – My friend Cailin likes horror movies, and I think this one was her choice. A remake, but based on a true story. I was only months away from meeting the spirits in my apartment…

Indiana Jones – I saw this (the latest Indy movie) before going to a Sox game in 2008. Not surprisingly, it wasn’t as good as any of the originals. But, I don’t think it was as bad as a lot of people say. The alien part made sense to me. Every Indiana Jones movie has religious implications. This one did too, if you think about it…

Shrek 2 – Big fan of Shrek and his movies. And even the Shrek the Halls Christmas special. Of course, that reminds me of Eve Eve and my nephews and niece, so I’m a little biased.

W – Wasn’t as scathing as I thought (or wanted) it to be, but like everything with “W”, I shook my head a lot.

Talladega Nights - I think I saw this one with Glen, too. Silly comedy that made me laugh a lot.

There Will Be Blood – Saw this with my friends Erin and Kerry. Daniel Say-Lewis was incredible, but I really didn’t like the movie/story. I kept thinking, “Okay, where’s the f’n blood?”

Student's Lottery Plans (1999)

I’m sure most of the teachers (especially special education teachers) have had a similar experience…

You’re having a frustrating day and/or week, and you wonder why you do what you do. The pay is crap, the work is hard, and sometimes there is a teacher/parent/administrator who (for reasons you can’t fathom) seems to have it in for you.

Then, something like this happens. It was 1999 and the lottery was in the hundreds of millions. We asked our students to write what they would do if they won the money, and this is what one of my students wrote:

As soon as I read it, I told him I needed a copy of it.

The best part of this student calling me a “good teacher” was how our relationship started. I was student teaching, and it was the first day of school. As all the teenaged students walked in, I smiled and greeted them. I smiled and said, “Hey, what’s up?” to him, and he answered by giving me the middle finger. I knew if I reacted with a “How dare you?”, he would be giving me the finger every morning. I shrugged it off, kept smiling, and he didn’t do it again.

Instead, we learned we had a lot in common. We talked about movies, TV, sports, and video games. He still wasn’t always the “model student” (see: People Who Don’t Suck), but being able to relate to him about other things made teaching easier. Eventually, he ended up listening to me more than his parents.

I remember one morning, his mother called the classroom. She said he wasn’t getting out of bed and said he didn’t want to go to school. I had her put him on the phone, and a few minutes later I had convinced him to come to school.

So teachers, if you’re having one of those days or weeks, keep in mind that you have one of the most important jobs. And no matter what a parent or co-worker says to you, you are making the lives of your students better. I hope more often than not you are getting reminders like this that help you realize you are making a difference…

PS- How many days ‘til February vacation?

Tarzan Far Side

I have been a fan of the Far Side for a long time, and this still ranks up there as one of my favorites.

This was on my door in college and did a great job of encapsulating my skills at talking to all the BC women…

Happy Tuesday!

Note from Suzie (February 5, 1994)

So there I was in rehab during my sophomore year in college…

I was placed in the “dual diagnosis” program for people that had problems with drugs/alcohol in addition to emotional issues. I certainly had post-cancer feelings I wasn’t coping with in a healthy way (drinking shot after show of vodka, for instance), but I felt most of the other “guests” at McLean had emotional issues that were more severe and had been with them longer than mine. There were people that heard voices, some that hated everything about themselves, and others that wanted to hurt themselves. I just wanted to get back to BC, so I did what I needed to do. I agreed to go to a counselor at school and look into when there were AA meetings on campus (more on these later).

When I did get back to campus, this note was waiting for me from my friend Suzie:

I had met Suzie when she was walking through my dorm one night. She and her friends stopped to look at my door, and she was admiring some David Letterman top ten list I had posted. We talked for a bit, and when I told her that I worked at The Club (a late night snack/hangout place), she told me she had just applied for a job. We ended up working together at The Club, and have been friends ever since.

Even though Suzie had only known me for a few months, her note was already reminding me in that I shouldn’t be drinking anymore. And even though I had just gotten back from rehab, I still wasn’t ready to stop. She also mentions the David Letterman t-shirt I got her when I went to a viewing of the show in December of 1993 (my friend Tim and I went thanks to tickets my friend Patrick gave us…awesome time!). My only hope is that one day some college student will refer to wearing a Dave McGrath t-shirt as “thrilling”. We’ll see how that goes…

Thanks, Suzie, for letting me post this and for being such a great friend over the years!